Imagine if our music industry was a school and each artist had a different role! Which position would some of your favourite creatives occupy? Lets laugh a bit, it’s medicine for the soul….. Read, Enjoy and Laugh,

NB: kindly note the article has a mix of English and Shona text

By Trevor Mawaka

SHONA TEACHER – hazvibvunzwe izvo, of-course ndi JAH PRAYZAH. Nyaudzosingwi nemadimikira zvanoimba hapana mwana anofoira shona. Jah Prayzah ndinyanduri anoPublisher mapoems ake in the form of songs. Iwe, imagine this line ‘UNENGE BHANAN’ ANA DENGA RINORIDZA NGOMA ‘ Aaah hameno anozvitora kupi?

Jah Prayzah

SCIENCES TEACHER – There is only one artist who seems to know all the theories in science and that is WINKY D. From Albert Einstein’ s theory of reletivity to Steven Hawking’s theory of exploding Black holes, the Gafa will cover it all with precision and definiteness

Winky D

PHYSICAL EDUCATION TEACHER – P E is for the active guys wanogona kuJamba Jamba and hapana artist anojambirana na JAH SIGNAL. That’s a given kuti ndiye angangoita the best PE teacher. And with stance on sexually suggestive dances, our kids will surely be safe with him

Jah Master, Holy Ten, John Cole

KARATE TRAINER…. HU HA… JAH MASTER upon the session.. Tosvika kuJapan for international finals

Jah Master

NBEBELE TEACHER – Singathi ubaba U ALBERT NYATHI asibambele IsiNdebele singalahleka na. With his deep lingo and wordplay asidingi isicazamazwi.. Lobona njani?

Albert Nyathi

DANCE TRAINER… let me suggest ALICK MACHESO.  His dancing skills are still an envy of many other teachers. He will be ably supported by NKULULEKO DUBE of IYASA. Nkululeko Innocent Dube has danced his way from schools to palaces so I am sure he can create another IYASA story again

Alick Macheso

RELIGIOUS STUDIES – l guess JANET MANYOWA will just have to accept the post. She has been running the subject with grace for many years so I guess its proper to just formally appoint her.  MAMBO DHUTERERE can assist her, especially when explaining concepts of how Christianity relates to our culture.  I tell, you maA egaega

Janet Manyowa

ENGLISH TEACHER – let’s have MARK NGWAZI. Mark Ngwazi anongosvika muclass oti ‘I don’t blame people for disappointing you, I blame yourself for trusting them. Akangodaro class yatopasa kare..

Mark Ngwazi

COMMERCE AND ACCOUNTS TEACHER– apa toisa artist uya anogona zvemari sitereki anobata Mari dzechema parufu dzoso Dissappear uya.. Ehe iyeye.. Wamuziva hantie.  Ini ndakanganwa zita rake but I know wamuziva hako.. Tarisa pama Picture aripo.

First Farai

GEOGRAPHY TEACHER – Lets have the Ancestor VUSA MKHAYA. Vusa Mkhaya has traveled the world and seen most landforms so much that he will give first hand experiences.  What’s your take.?

©️StickyPics _ Vusa Mkhaya

MATHAMATICS– Maths dzoda wanopfeka magirazi.. Enda ku Alevel unoona Maths ndoine maStudents emagirazi hobho… Ndeupi artist anopfeka magirazi? Ngatimbofungai..

FASHION and FABRICS – FREEMAN.. baba wanoda zvemachira emucheno iwawo. I think uku wanobata basa.. Wanobatsirwa na Stunner Tazoita Cash Records na Mudiwa Hood. Iri department rinenge riri safe


AGRICULTURE – If the rumors are true then let ROKI run this department. It seems he is already a practicing farmer Saka he knows the practical side as well


HISTORY – Our trusted teacher, Cde CHINGX is late, so we still have a vacancy and we seem to be failing to get a good replacement

MUSIC TEACHER– that one is reserved for Mono Mukundu. He knows his staff and stuff (music majors know the difference) and is quite eloquent as well so I am sure we will produce more musicians.

Mono Mukundu

SOCCER COACH – Have heard KING SHADDY has happy feet muground rebhora. And have heard kuti FREEMAN wanokawa nawo. Aah Saka Wanobatsirana kuGround ikoko, wachabvumirana wega kuti ndeupi heard coach.

King Shaddy

Headmaster-BOB NYABINDE.. Thats a no brainer.. Hantie agara ndiHeadmaster

Bob Nyabinde

SENIOR TEACHER – it can only NICHOLAS ZACHARIA… The senior Teacher’s post is for the most experienced teacher who knows the ins and outs of the school. Of course Madzibaba is called the SENIOR LECTURER of the music industry, easily convertible to the senior teacher of the school. Anyways, some of his students like ALICK MACHESO are now part of the teaching staff


Aaah.. Mozoti ndiri selfish, chiwedzerai staff megawo, or kuchinja pasingaiti




One comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s